Peonies

I have always been secretly and sometimes explicitly in love with flowers. Always the beauty of it delights me, but perhaps the more intriguing part is the gripping realization of temporariness. The beauty intrigues you, the colors captivates, the texture calms you down. You stand before this beautiful item and is taken aback by it all. Yet in a couple of days it wilts, leaving nothing but traces of memories in your mind and heart.

This horribly resonates with what I feel at the moment.

We just wrote our final exam yesterday, marking the end of our second year. Summer break has officially started and I am checking myself in online for my flight tomorrow. My suitcase if halfpacked, my flat half cleaned. My heart half-hearted. I am incredibly excited and partially relieved to fly home - it's been a year too long. I miss the feeling of being home, of waking up in my own bed and having my family in the other room. I am looking forward to spending time with them, going for lunches and dinners in places I have tasted and adores, in places they have tasted and adore when I was away.

Yet again I am increasingly being aware of how attatched I have become to this place. To the memories, to the people, to the connections I formed as I navigated my way through in living by myself. It feels so natural to have them within biking distance, to call them and dine and chat and enjoy their companies as they navigate their way through the days.

I know it's just one and a half months, and I will see some of them again before I leave for my exchange to France. But yesterday it dawns upon me the realization that we are almost done. When I'm back, we'll be taking our respective majors and consumed in writing our thesis, until we graduate and scatter once more. How fast time pushes us is striking, inevitable. Yet again as I am looking - just looking - at these beautiful peonies makes me feel incredibly grateful.

To be surrounded by those you love, to love and be loved in return is indeed one of the greatest things I will forever cherish.